Unhealthy Patterns in Relationships: Identifying the Warning Signs of Serial Monogamy

As a psychologist, I’ve noticed a pattern among some individuals who find themselves jumping from one romantic relationship to the next without taking time to reflect and recharge in between. This phenomenon is known as “serial monogamy.” While it’s natural to feel emotional attachment to someone, repeatedly getting into new relationships without addressing unresolved issues can lead to unhealthy dynamics and a lack of personal growth.

Here are three signs that you might be a serial monogamist:

1. You constantly bring up your past: Sharing stories about your previous partners can be therapeutic, but if it becomes an excessive habit, it may be a sign that you’re still emotionally attached to your ex or using the conversation as a way to avoid intimacy with your current partner.

“When we don’t fully understand how our life experiences, traumas, previous relationships and families influence us, the way we show up in romantic partnerships will likely be a continuation of whatever role we played in those previous relationships,” says Moe Ari Brown, LMFT, therapist and Hinge’s Love and Connection expert. If you find yourself constantly discussing your past, it may be an indicator that you’re not ready to move on.

2. You become overly romantic about love: The thrill of falling in love can be a powerful experience, but when it becomes an unhealthy obsession, it’s essential to reevaluate your motivations. Constantly idealizing romantic relationships and seeking fulfillment solely through attachment can lead to unrealistic expectations and a lack of personal growth.

“Love addiction” is the term used to describe this phenomenon, where individuals become overly dependent on romantic relationships as a source of happiness. This mindset often sets you up for constant disappointment and lowers your commitment to making the relationship work. By accepting that even healthy relationships have imperfections, we can develop a more balanced view of what love should look like.

To break free from this pattern, consider taking an extended break from dating. Stepping away from the cycle allows you to reconnect with yourself, reflect on past experiences and build a healthier understanding of what romantic relationships should entail.

3. You struggle to find time for personal growth: Serial monogamists often prioritize their romantic relationships over self-care and individual development. As a result, they may neglect hobbies, social connections and other aspects that bring them fulfillment.

Source: www.forbes.com